Does this mean he fancies me?
Would you go further than holding hands to find out?
Sometimes it feels like everyone is having sex all the time. People are talking about it, so they must be doing it, right? Not really. Only one in four people lose their virginity before the age of 16, so if someone's boasting about having sex, it's possible that they're just lying about it.
Be aware
You might be thinking about love, but he might be thinking about sex. He may be under pressure from his mates, so he wants to be able to say he's done it.
Alcohol won't help
Many people lose their virginity when they're drunk. After just a couple of drinks, you might lose your judgment. But it will come back in the morning, and you might regret what you've done.
Does less sex = Better relationships?
If you make it clear that you're not about to lie down and have sex, you may find boys (and girls) respect you more. On Channel 4's recent No Sex Please, We're Teenagers the girls found they were able to talk to guys more easily once sex was off the agenda.
Read the signs
A lot of girls are surprised when a situation with a guy suddenly leads to sex. You need to read the signs. If he suggests you find a quiet place, gets a bit more touchy-feely, or suddenly turns on the sweet talk and flattery, then he might be talking about sex, even if you're not. Remember β you need to make up your mind whether you want to have sex. Don't let him decide for you and just go along with it. Stay in control of the situation βdon't try to pretend it's not happening.
Talk about it
It's better to have an embarrassing talk about sex than an embarrassing sexual encounter when you're not ready.
It's your choice
Remember that at any point you can make a choice. You have to decide whether to "go somewhere quiet" β don't let him make up your mind for you. Ask yourself if you really believe his sweet talk. Then work out how you want to respond, and decide how far to go. Ask yourself if you feel comfortable. Is it the right time, in the right place, and with the right person? These are all big decisions, which is another reason why it's hard to stay in control if you're drunk. You should never feel under any pressure to have sex β whether it's from your partner or your friends. It's an important decision and you need to feel ready.
Top Cheesy Lines
"We love each other, and it's only natural"
"I'll be very careful, trust me!"
"You'd do it if you loved me"
"If you don't want to, someone else will"
"It's bad for me to be so frustrated"
Brent Stories
Katema, 17
"They'll say 'I love you', or they'll try to make out it's not a big deal, saying, 'It's only two people having fun'"
Whitney, 16
"Most boys nowadays just say things like, 'Come to my house', and most girls would think, 'That's nice, maybe we're going to watch a movie'. But by saying that the guy is implying something else"
4 Nasty STIs
Chlamydia
This is on the increase in the UK. It can cause pelvic inflammatory disease and, if untreated, can cause infertility. As with any STI, just because you have no symptoms, it doesn't mean you haven't been infected. So you'll need a test if you've had unprotected sex.Gonorrhoea
A few days after infection, symptoms can appear, such as severe pain when peeing and a change in vaginal discharge. If left untreated it can lead to severe pelvic inflammatory disease.Genital warts
This viral infection is spread by skin-to-skin contact, but months or even years can pass between being infected and the warts appearing.Genital herpes
There's no cure, so if you have herpes it could keep recurring. Even when you have no sores it can be passed on.